Someone asked if there was a vacancy in my office. Noncholantly, I offered the position under my table. Strangely, that piqued her interest. Masking her perversion with her puppy dog look, she wanted to know the job function. Unmasking my perversion, I shot back "Sit and Spit".
I'm the only one allowed to "Sit and Split".
(real dumb but this conversation did take place)